Being born in a joint family, festivals for me have always been about gatherings, cheerful noises, relatives, and food. And when it comes to Dashain, it was no different. A little background about my family: my grandparents had seven kids, 5 sons, and 2 daughters of which my father is the youngest child, and me being the youngest child of my parents made me the youngest one in the family.
I was born in Biratnagar and I stayed there till I was 9 years old i.e. up to class 4. At that time, we would be given 15 days holiday and tons of holiday homework, as we used to call it back then. Day one would begin with me waking up at 5 AM in the morning, taking a bath, and going to Kali Mandir with my mother and my relatives. There used to be a huge line to enter the temple; there were separate lines for males and females, I being a kid used to be in the female line with my mother. There used to be local sellers outside the temple selling balloons and toys. I used to ask my mother to buy a balloon every day, maybe I have even cried requesting to buy toys sometimes.
When I was 10, I was in Birgunj and me, my sister, father, and mother would get a ticket to Biratnagar and reach home by Saptami. Saptami used to be the day of our gathering. It used to be a big gathering, not just our family but also relatives (my grandfather’s cousins and their family) making it a mass of 40-50 people. The next bhoj would be at Sailabwa’s on Ashtami morning, and then in the evening, we would all be gathered at thulobwa’s for the bhoj. On Navami, it would be our turn for the bhoj and it went so for years.
On the 10th day, we go to the temple and arrange jamara for the tika. My father and my kailabwa would keep reminding of us good-time for tika. We would all get ready putting on the new clothes and go to thulobwa’s house which was just 1 min far from ours. Aaji (my lovely grandmother) would be ready with tika and start putting on the tika. The tika always started with pancha kanya, so my sister and my cousin sister were the first ones to put the tika. Then thulobwa and thulomummy, mailabwa and mailimummy, sailabwa and sailimummy, kailabwa and kailimummy, my parents and tons of my cousins. It would take half an hour for me to put on tika. In the evening, we used to go to mamaghar and the gathering there would be fun. Then we would go on to put tika from other relatives. It used to be a buys 3-4 days for us.
Dashain, as a kid, used to be all about eating, playing cards, going to the temple, getting new clothes, and receiving dakshina. After my grandmother passed four years ago, Dashain has never been the same for me. Also, in the same year, my sister went to the US for her further education, and the same for my cousin i.e. either got married or went outside for further education. We are all in our homes, some in Chainpur, some in Biratnagar, some in Kathmandu, and some either in US or Australia. We would all do a group video call and get the blessings at that time. It is very difficult for me to adjust sometimes, putting tika after 20-30 people to being the first one to put tika, from bhoj and all for such long days to feeling Dashain starts on the 10th day, from having 30-40 people around to being just three (me, my father and my mother), Dashain has never been the same for me, and the excitement I had as a kid is no more. Hopefully, someday we would all be at the same place again and celebrate this beautiful festival as we did in our childhood days. Thanks to the internet we atleast connect virtually. This is how time changes us and there is nothing we can do about it. We had no Dashain this year, so just wanted to share what’s going on in my mind right now.
Happy Dashain to all!!!